Bedbugs C

Bedbugs C


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



It's come down to this in time made troublesome
by our own hands and minds. Fighting inside
the maelstrom again, raging and stunned by
a charred, flourescent-lit future of potentials
unwanted by on a cold day in March I'm
reminded of the best and worst kinds of love.
Not as a concept but something out of the
stories and real, if temporary. As she throws
sticks I smiled, delaying the inevitable.
Then she was gone. But the best and worst of
trying and joyous times still represented one thing:
the music in the basement- is the language of
spies, and, forcing clear thought, everyone
realizes it's a welcome distraction but a
distraction nonetheless. Too deep under
bridges lay my ambition. Layers of regret
grown on one's face like moldy beards.
But in a nanosecond of clarity allowed,
green ribbons notwithstanding, I
decide the house and record cannot hurt
me without my consent.

I sit down and create. Undistracted. Noises
ignored. Friendship and romance delayed. And
things get done. Ideas bloom. She wanted
to be in the mountains, one day I hope to
find her again- but a complete being
this time. Daily I force the footwork
until it sprouts other ideas, and...
MOTIVATION. Doing the creative work,
truly, prioritized, turned off the phonograph. I don't
even know where it is. It could return at
anytime but I do not let it. I'm young again.
A blank page before me will soon be filled-
with what? Doesn't matter. What I forgot
to say was....

-Adam Barnick


END CYCLE TWO
100 chapters completed


The end.

Bedbugs XCVIX

Bedbugs XCVIX


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.




Working out the wickedness and black stains on
all our souls we keep from country and tell them
what happens on the next page, higher ups! They'd
panic less, if done! Time is so short..if you
decide it's that way. Isolated, so you don't have
to be. Go live your inauthentic gameplan you ordered
out of a catalog. She stopped caring who I am years
ago and I let it take years of love, of discovery,
of pages filled with words of knowledge and perfect..
whatever. Focus. The music won't go away, staying
up late to watch life unravel won't help. Just ignore
what you hear and sit at the desk daily and
fill pages. This is it. This can fix things.
I whisper to an office cellmate and we do.
The next day, the world is in color. Fantastic, pain-free
plans for all of us sounds like the right idea. Just
do the brave footwork others refuse. This may be it..
but when I wake upon day 3, I'm in a basement
from years ago. The record's there, not playing anything.
Swatting nails into your emotional patchwork as it
mesmerises and distracts others who are trapped here. Eager
doctors and needles are waiting. What do we
do? How to we..they're taking over, my hand starts
straining and the creative urge is sifting away..this
is almost the end..


The last chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:



-On a cold day in March
-as shethrows sticks
-is the language of spies
-too deep under bridges
-green ribbons
-she wanted to be in the mountains
-what I forgot to say was...



-Adam

Bedbugs XCVIII

Bedbugs XCVIII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Simultaneously gaining and losing
strength but I'll lose in the end
bat a second glance at a past failure
and you're done, kid. Intensity wings
strapped on back as a miscalculation
she should have been more sanitary get out
of my mind! Find out where I can and
how to get back on track with lives and
history and elements that could maybe
wipe out this horrible lonely place I'm growing
old in. Professional victims watch ticking
clocks while trying to drive and look back
simultaneously. Knowing feelings remain
won't five and two make disorientation.
Lie down but not for long. The song plays in
the basement but I know how to ignore it!
I think. Help me be my true self,
somebody! Are they becoming free?


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-tell them what happens on the next page
-isolated, so you don't have to be
-she stopped caring who I am years ago
-staying up late to watch
-fantastic pain-free plans for all of us
-swatting nails into your emotional
-this is almost the end



-Adam

Bedbugs XCVII

Bedbugs XCVII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Coming to consciousness faster than ever
before as someone raises the world volume to
try and defeat me. Tell me your name once
more- probably rhymed with apathy. Step away.
Met her when she was 8. How old was I?
Will they even recognize me? They have been successful
for a long time. I tried but did not try enough.
Inspiration returns as I swim to the surface.
Future can be bright.. snapping sounds
in one's head. Try to focus. Self loathing
friends yearn to dish distracting advice.
Vision blurs a bit. Now what? Tell me who
are all of you?


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-bat a second glance
-wings strapped on back
-she should have been more sanitary
-professional victims
-knowing feelings remain
-five and two make
-are they becoming free?


-Adam

Bedbugs XCVI

Bedbugs XCVI


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Fight it. You're so close to a simple truth uncovered.
Ignore what you hear and create your own stimuli.
Stuck in the mud today are most others- dizzy spells
begin if approached. Run! Anywhere!
The chain pointless junctures punctured like the rib
basement no longer houses the minds of men who are
able to turn away. Wind's picking up.
We're wasting and spanning time, in black and white
spinning wheels for years. Resist. Waiting for a
good line is no excuse! It's so cold..resist.
They look comfortable but they are not. The footwork.
That's it. All that can save you. That's it!
Challenges ahead? Welcomed.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-tell me your name once more
-met her when she was 8
-will they even recognize me?
-inspiration returns
-future can be bright
-self loathing friends
-who are all of you?

-Adam

Bedbugs XCV

Bedbugs XCV


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


The voices told us sit back in our chairs,
everything would be all right. I do, this time.
Omnivores gather at dawn, my mind coughs out.
What was before seven? If we stay here, we die.
All now dead. Even the gibberish here is shallow. Aging
mentally when you say the word don't tell her you love
her again was the other thought I had upon waking.
Angering a false god is on the to-do list.
Will I ever get back where I wanted to be?
Will anyone consider walking that path
with me? Presented for your approval are my sins.
In just weeks- is that music I hear?



Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-stuck in the mud today
-pointless junctures
-basement no longer houses the
-we're wasting and spanning time
-waiting for a good line
-the footwork. That's it.
-challenges ahead? Welcomed.


-Adam

Five installments remain in the Bedbugs series,
which will end on New Year's Eve.

Bedbugs XCIV

Bedbugs XCIV

Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Help me get back on track! Why do I need help?
Nobody owes me and my mind, nobody can
stop it, I'm told and it's long overdue. Try to
stay on the road, where's my cut of the income?
Propelled to the a force to behold on stage blasts
through layers of flesh and regret and we have the
proper image now, like it or not. It's in sight.
The horizon-overcast inside, twice if not a million
times. Adjust thought if needed, encouraged. We
are lost again. She doesn't mind. I'm anxious. Now what?
Don't let them hurt you again. Exorcise what's ailing you.
Simple solution? One hopes and prays. No matter what so
very soon now, it ends.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-omnivores gather at dawn
-if we stay here we die
-aging mentally when you say the word
-don't tell her you love her again
-angering a false god
-presented for your approval
-is that music I hear?


-Adam

October 2, 2007

Bedbugs XCIII

Bedbugs XCIII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



After a long blackout I am awake. I am here,
I am present. Many have been lost
and abandoned and burned out and never returned
to help. Ideas, or friends? Gather both
and lost in the tunnel is where I often
am found, reported, measuring what makes a man
has become a full time job. How to stop
wasting time? Concentrating on it is needed
to be discarded and slain, not mastered.
I remember our first date. I remember our
third anniversary of the day you left. Do you
hear music? No, I hear panic. Both
are familiar. Tell them both before you leave
and then succeed by being manchildren
behind a good man's back. Anxiety
growing as things darken. Someone has started
a new song. Can you help me with any
dilemma? Here's the thing. Nobody owes
you shit. And with that, you are free to make
your own road. And you can truly make it.
That red streak in your hair is beautiful.
Finish line is in sight.



Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:


-Nobody can stop it, I'm told
-where's my cut of the income
-a force to behold on stage
-we have the proper image now
-overcast inside, twice
-exorcise what's ailing you
-very soon now, it ends


-Adam

Six Word Theater

Click here for the previous entry.

Inspired by the challenge of telling a story in six words,
I attempt to polish my skills by writing a six-word
story or phrase whenever I can.

Feel free to "continue the story" or start your own
in the comments.

Today's entry:



Found love; lost the instruction manual.



-A.B.

Bedbugs XCII

Bedbugs XCII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Rows of former sentients and they are clustered here,
all of them drinking and pretending it's their purpose and that
it isn't another form of electronic poison that manages to
pretend to know. Thoughts are jumbled..fight it, there are
few chapters left. Still fantasizing of her even when denied
the experience to keep one's self safe. Opinions are shouted
from the hilltop to satisfy no one here to hear it or understand
she isn't planning to come back. An apology would fix many
a thing but in the meantime purpose must be one's main
purpose. Team effort means everyone doing what the one
who walked outside the lines and beat the fear or faked it
told them or encouraged them to do! Ambition; rust
is spreading on it. Try to challenge me to something else
while I can breathe. We're nearly back on track, keep
fighting..not much further left to travel.



Next week's seven phrases/groups of words



-lost in the tunnel
-measuring what makes a man
-concentrating on it
-tell them both before you leave
-anxiety growing
-can you help me with
-finish line is in sight


-adam

Bedbugs XCI

Bedbugs XCI


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


You've meandered long enough and now the bell is tolling. You
can get back to where you wanted to be and it will be like nothing
happened victory is at hand but distraction is far too willing to be
your lifetime companion until you turn grey. We're coming in,
Hell's coming with us. Does that mean we'll accomplish something?
Swim up to the surface of the real fucking world, discern what's important
and live more authentically than allowed. Three doctors in red
are waiting. Scrawl something down to satisfy them. Is anyone
out there even going to read it? Write something subversive
and check. You come and work for me and we'll defeat this
world together, even if you don't really exist. With me, for me,
not against a matter of defeats and deceipt which is all
too common in your level of paint it before it's too late
and see how where it went wrong, erase; focus will help us
escape out of thoughts and into actions. I can't take
another needle. Swim up, run fast, try and don't
look back again..



Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:



-all of them drinking
-still fantasizing of her even when denied
-no one here to hear it
-team effoft
-rust is spreading on it
-challenge me to something else
-not much further left to travel

-Adam

Bedbugs XC

Bedbugs XC

Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Honest story, dishonestly told. I can't peel myself off the
floor this week. None of those appearing are villains,
they're just people. Except for her, and her. Him too.
Riverbed dry is where my head's at. Need water and a
seashell to put my ear up to and I can hear them all wishing
I'd simply create. Thought you would save me is a phrase
that's stuck, wish I didn't hear..but I caused that trouble and
own up to it, even after the one who said it died.
Cheated on us anyway and brought back no proper
insights or ideas. Opening a random tome while check on page 82
pops into my brain. The page is delightfully blank.
Whose office is this? I don't belong here. Escape before
there's grey hair. 60 years of study hall isn't needed.
WAKE UP!!!! Not a cue for you to send me a warning,
nor a promotion. Thankfully I do wake up, the plot resumes
properly tomorrow; I clarify everything once more.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:

-victory is at hand
-we're coming in, hell's coming with us
-discern what' important
-come and work for me
-paint it before it's too late
-where it went wrong, erase
-don't look back again

Bedbugs LXXXIX

Bedbugs LXXXIX


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Tell me again of how you misled many times the
careless and casual who wandered into your nest, thinking
they'd find something synonymous with love instead of
what you're famous for. I would split all their heads. Knowing
routine that is acted out at 78rpm she's turned the record off
because all of your are cutting the violence out of your diet
and trying to distract me from my life and purpose with your
apathetic siren songs. Trouble who gave you that scar isn't any
of my business. Mental pornographic endeavors wasted away
under interlaced images that aren't registering on any
printed fashions I know of color got darker outside
and I can tell it's coming for me and hoping I clear it up and wake
up and own up to all my mistakes. Who sounds like rain outside
hiding above the floor in plain sight, traveling back to when she
geniunely meant her smile to be a smile instead of a weapon. Don't
be afraid; you can go anywhere.



Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:

-riverbed dry
-and I can hear them all
-thought you would save me
-cheated on us anyway
-check on page 82
-not a cue for you to send me
-clarify everything once more

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXVIII

Bedbugs LXXXVIII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



We've waited and wondered and stood atop this hill
until it began to turn to mud and ash, but we held
our positions, ruining your happiest day would all
I'd be thinking about if I didn't have these goals.
Left behind, locked in the room nobody'd hear me
in..looking at that same tattered picture glued to the
wall next to me..what differentiates this from any
other cubicle/cell/state of mind, pleasure taken in
only the two weeks the faceless man allows you.
Don't fall for it! Walk out when he's not looking, and
without his features he's never really seeing for himself.
Outside and looking down, worried but captivated
by the view. Two years, tops..but still you're fighting.
As it should be. The good times are nearly here, still
time to fix the city in your head if you think you've
got the proper material to rebuild. Applause broke out
the moment you actually gave it your all. Tune it out anyway.
Surgical rooms before me have no shortage of willing donors.
Avoid. Avoid. Run. Or simply don't go in. I am
h0lding my position like only a few others have. She somehow
picks up on this. How long it's been is unimportant.


-misled many times
-she's turned the record off
-who gave you that scar
-mental pornographic endeavors
-color got darker outside
-sounds like rain outside
-you can go anywhere


-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXVII

Bedbugs LXXXVII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Age is forcing one of us and all of us
to choose solid paths, it seems.
Take a deep, healthy breath and
lean in to the brothers buried him
with all his secrets. It was no
secrets in this town, they thought.
It was a decision. That alone
she will sleep with you, you think
as her memory flashes by, but
it's not true unless she needs something.
Ambient. Noises think it over before
you earn it. You'll probably take five years.
Curious about what you said
when we were killing together. Overcast
again, and this time indoors.
Who can read my thoughts? It truly
won't hurt for long.




Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:


-ruining your happiest day
-pleasure taken in
-two years, tops
-still time to fix the city
-applause broke out
-surgical rooms before me
-how long it's been is unimportant

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXVI

Bedbugs LXXXVI


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Trusted advice given down by the riverside:
never depend on anyone else for
happiness or money or she'll get hers but only
if she knows somewhere
she did wrong. It's cooling down and
we are, for your happiness and mine,
beginning to focus. Clarity hitch
up to the dream once more and meet
old friends on the path. Soon it will be like
no time has passed. You'll forget the record and its-
no scarcity to be found! Kill that thought and
embrace an abundant one.
Come closer- still think of ya from time to time
as my spine distorts- is that noise
coming from outside?


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:

-the brothers buried him
-no secrets in this town
-she will sleep with you
-think it over before
-curious about what you said
-overcast again
-it truly won't hurt for long

-adam

"Aaron Bacon" Promotional Video

A look at the short film Aaron Bacon, based on the true story
of a young man who was abused and passed away at the hands
of untrained staff at an unlicensed 'rehab camp' in the wilderness of Nevada.

Aaron Bacon premiered last week at the Shanghai International
Film Festival and will premiere in the US very soon.

Aaron Bacon is written and directed by Nick Gaglia(Over the GW).
Promo video was directed and edited by Adam Barnick.

Bedbugs LXXXV

Bedbugs LXXXV


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Observation from this room of wood and stain
and green haze: the lesser ones tell everyone
and the true pioneers keep to themselves and
simply get it all done. I find a new one's picture
and from somewhere, I hear that 'that smile
will be for you one day.' I hope more than one day, indeed.
It can't not improve just ask enough people to help
or remind you to keep at it! Why is everyone in the
building crying? Something is running at me but it's too
dark to make out- I wake up, finally, and I bet others do too.
My real room. Pleasant but the dream texture
lingers as it rains and clouds devour each other outside;
atmosphere to spare indeed but what time is it and what
is my purpose now, now that I can write it? Avoid all
temptations for easy shortcuts, pick up the needle
and start again is all too easy for these listeners.
Earning failures today may help more than you think.
I rub the rust from my eyes and clarity returns
bit by bit.


Next week's seven phrases/groups of words

-never depend on anyone else
-she'll get hers but only if
-for your happiness and mine
-hitch up to the dream once more
-no scarcity to be found
-still think of ya from time to time
-is that noise coming from outside?

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXIV

Bedbugs LXXXIV


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Who is listening besides the two of us? I have to admit
I don't even know if you're just waiting for your
turn to talk. Who's holding that string at your wrist?
Stop looking back they repeat, like the skipping
record I thought had been left behind in the fog
and the basement's memories. Could enjoyable cast
lined up as a diversion from purpose, or to help
pretend I'm not on this walk alone? I've accepted it;
now the illusions should follow suit. She will sooner
or later face what she's done; did you hear that?
You will, hopefully someone will be there to laugh.
My time is truly coming..keep fighting the fog park
on the right where it's safe. Everything is safe in
between the lines. That's not what we're built for
though. Nothing on the radio but several lies of omission
and I've heard that sickly sweet song before. I sadly
know the words. I pretend I didn't write it.
When do we get to wake up? Notes left in here-
-it got better today, tomorrow you'll notice.


Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:

-the lesser ones tell everyone
-that smile will be for you one day
-just ask enough people
-atmosphere to spare
-pick up the needle and start again
-earning failures today
-clarity returns bit by bit

-adam