Bedbugs XCVIX

Bedbugs XCVIX


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Click here for the previous Bedbugs.




Working out the wickedness and black stains on
all our souls we keep from country and tell them
what happens on the next page, higher ups! They'd
panic less, if done! Time is so short..if you
decide it's that way. Isolated, so you don't have
to be. Go live your inauthentic gameplan you ordered
out of a catalog. She stopped caring who I am years
ago and I let it take years of love, of discovery,
of pages filled with words of knowledge and perfect..
whatever. Focus. The music won't go away, staying
up late to watch life unravel won't help. Just ignore
what you hear and sit at the desk daily and
fill pages. This is it. This can fix things.
I whisper to an office cellmate and we do.
The next day, the world is in color. Fantastic, pain-free
plans for all of us sounds like the right idea. Just
do the brave footwork others refuse. This may be it..
but when I wake upon day 3, I'm in a basement
from years ago. The record's there, not playing anything.
Swatting nails into your emotional patchwork as it
mesmerises and distracts others who are trapped here. Eager
doctors and needles are waiting. What do we
do? How to we..they're taking over, my hand starts
straining and the creative urge is sifting away..this
is almost the end..


The last chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:



-On a cold day in March
-as shethrows sticks
-is the language of spies
-too deep under bridges
-green ribbons
-she wanted to be in the mountains
-what I forgot to say was...



-Adam

Bedbugs XCVIII

Bedbugs XCVIII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Simultaneously gaining and losing
strength but I'll lose in the end
bat a second glance at a past failure
and you're done, kid. Intensity wings
strapped on back as a miscalculation
she should have been more sanitary get out
of my mind! Find out where I can and
how to get back on track with lives and
history and elements that could maybe
wipe out this horrible lonely place I'm growing
old in. Professional victims watch ticking
clocks while trying to drive and look back
simultaneously. Knowing feelings remain
won't five and two make disorientation.
Lie down but not for long. The song plays in
the basement but I know how to ignore it!
I think. Help me be my true self,
somebody! Are they becoming free?


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-tell them what happens on the next page
-isolated, so you don't have to be
-she stopped caring who I am years ago
-staying up late to watch
-fantastic pain-free plans for all of us
-swatting nails into your emotional
-this is almost the end



-Adam

Bedbugs XCVII

Bedbugs XCVII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Coming to consciousness faster than ever
before as someone raises the world volume to
try and defeat me. Tell me your name once
more- probably rhymed with apathy. Step away.
Met her when she was 8. How old was I?
Will they even recognize me? They have been successful
for a long time. I tried but did not try enough.
Inspiration returns as I swim to the surface.
Future can be bright.. snapping sounds
in one's head. Try to focus. Self loathing
friends yearn to dish distracting advice.
Vision blurs a bit. Now what? Tell me who
are all of you?


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-bat a second glance
-wings strapped on back
-she should have been more sanitary
-professional victims
-knowing feelings remain
-five and two make
-are they becoming free?


-Adam

Bedbugs XCVI

Bedbugs XCVI


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Fight it. You're so close to a simple truth uncovered.
Ignore what you hear and create your own stimuli.
Stuck in the mud today are most others- dizzy spells
begin if approached. Run! Anywhere!
The chain pointless junctures punctured like the rib
basement no longer houses the minds of men who are
able to turn away. Wind's picking up.
We're wasting and spanning time, in black and white
spinning wheels for years. Resist. Waiting for a
good line is no excuse! It's so cold..resist.
They look comfortable but they are not. The footwork.
That's it. All that can save you. That's it!
Challenges ahead? Welcomed.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-tell me your name once more
-met her when she was 8
-will they even recognize me?
-inspiration returns
-future can be bright
-self loathing friends
-who are all of you?

-Adam

Bedbugs XCV

Bedbugs XCV


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


The voices told us sit back in our chairs,
everything would be all right. I do, this time.
Omnivores gather at dawn, my mind coughs out.
What was before seven? If we stay here, we die.
All now dead. Even the gibberish here is shallow. Aging
mentally when you say the word don't tell her you love
her again was the other thought I had upon waking.
Angering a false god is on the to-do list.
Will I ever get back where I wanted to be?
Will anyone consider walking that path
with me? Presented for your approval are my sins.
In just weeks- is that music I hear?



Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-stuck in the mud today
-pointless junctures
-basement no longer houses the
-we're wasting and spanning time
-waiting for a good line
-the footwork. That's it.
-challenges ahead? Welcomed.


-Adam

Five installments remain in the Bedbugs series,
which will end on New Year's Eve.

Bedbugs XCIV

Bedbugs XCIV

Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Help me get back on track! Why do I need help?
Nobody owes me and my mind, nobody can
stop it, I'm told and it's long overdue. Try to
stay on the road, where's my cut of the income?
Propelled to the a force to behold on stage blasts
through layers of flesh and regret and we have the
proper image now, like it or not. It's in sight.
The horizon-overcast inside, twice if not a million
times. Adjust thought if needed, encouraged. We
are lost again. She doesn't mind. I'm anxious. Now what?
Don't let them hurt you again. Exorcise what's ailing you.
Simple solution? One hopes and prays. No matter what so
very soon now, it ends.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-omnivores gather at dawn
-if we stay here we die
-aging mentally when you say the word
-don't tell her you love her again
-angering a false god
-presented for your approval
-is that music I hear?


-Adam

Bedbugs XCIII

Bedbugs XCIII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



After a long blackout I am awake. I am here,
I am present. Many have been lost
and abandoned and burned out and never returned
to help. Ideas, or friends? Gather both
and lost in the tunnel is where I often
am found, reported, measuring what makes a man
has become a full time job. How to stop
wasting time? Concentrating on it is needed
to be discarded and slain, not mastered.
I remember our first date. I remember our
third anniversary of the day you left. Do you
hear music? No, I hear panic. Both
are familiar. Tell them both before you leave
and then succeed by being manchildren
behind a good man's back. Anxiety
growing as things darken. Someone has started
a new song. Can you help me with any
dilemma? Here's the thing. Nobody owes
you shit. And with that, you are free to make
your own road. And you can truly make it.
That red streak in your hair is beautiful.
Finish line is in sight.



Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:


-Nobody can stop it, I'm told
-where's my cut of the income
-a force to behold on stage
-we have the proper image now
-overcast inside, twice
-exorcise what's ailing you
-very soon now, it ends


-Adam

Bedbugs XCII

Bedbugs XCII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Rows of former sentients and they are clustered here,
all of them drinking and pretending it's their purpose and that
it isn't another form of electronic poison that manages to
pretend to know. Thoughts are jumbled..fight it, there are
few chapters left. Still fantasizing of her even when denied
the experience to keep one's self safe. Opinions are shouted
from the hilltop to satisfy no one here to hear it or understand
she isn't planning to come back. An apology would fix many
a thing but in the meantime purpose must be one's main
purpose. Team effort means everyone doing what the one
who walked outside the lines and beat the fear or faked it
told them or encouraged them to do! Ambition; rust
is spreading on it. Try to challenge me to something else
while I can breathe. We're nearly back on track, keep
fighting..not much further left to travel.



Next week's seven phrases/groups of words



-lost in the tunnel
-measuring what makes a man
-concentrating on it
-tell them both before you leave
-anxiety growing
-can you help me with
-finish line is in sight


-adam

Bedbugs XCI

Bedbugs XCI


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


You've meandered long enough and now the bell is tolling. You
can get back to where you wanted to be and it will be like nothing
happened victory is at hand but distraction is far too willing to be
your lifetime companion until you turn grey. We're coming in,
Hell's coming with us. Does that mean we'll accomplish something?
Swim up to the surface of the real fucking world, discern what's important
and live more authentically than allowed. Three doctors in red
are waiting. Scrawl something down to satisfy them. Is anyone
out there even going to read it? Write something subversive
and check. You come and work for me and we'll defeat this
world together, even if you don't really exist. With me, for me,
not against a matter of defeats and deceipt which is all
too common in your level of paint it before it's too late
and see how where it went wrong, erase; focus will help us
escape out of thoughts and into actions. I can't take
another needle. Swim up, run fast, try and don't
look back again..



Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:



-all of them drinking
-still fantasizing of her even when denied
-no one here to hear it
-team effoft
-rust is spreading on it
-challenge me to something else
-not much further left to travel

-Adam

Bedbugs XC

Bedbugs XC

Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Honest story, dishonestly told. I can't peel myself off the
floor this week. None of those appearing are villains,
they're just people. Except for her, and her. Him too.
Riverbed dry is where my head's at. Need water and a
seashell to put my ear up to and I can hear them all wishing
I'd simply create. Thought you would save me is a phrase
that's stuck, wish I didn't hear..but I caused that trouble and
own up to it, even after the one who said it died.
Cheated on us anyway and brought back no proper
insights or ideas. Opening a random tome while check on page 82
pops into my brain. The page is delightfully blank.
Whose office is this? I don't belong here. Escape before
there's grey hair. 60 years of study hall isn't needed.
WAKE UP!!!! Not a cue for you to send me a warning,
nor a promotion. Thankfully I do wake up, the plot resumes
properly tomorrow; I clarify everything once more.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:

-victory is at hand
-we're coming in, hell's coming with us
-discern what' important
-come and work for me
-paint it before it's too late
-where it went wrong, erase
-don't look back again

Bedbugs LXXXIX

Bedbugs LXXXIX


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Tell me again of how you misled many times the
careless and casual who wandered into your nest, thinking
they'd find something synonymous with love instead of
what you're famous for. I would split all their heads. Knowing
routine that is acted out at 78rpm she's turned the record off
because all of your are cutting the violence out of your diet
and trying to distract me from my life and purpose with your
apathetic siren songs. Trouble who gave you that scar isn't any
of my business. Mental pornographic endeavors wasted away
under interlaced images that aren't registering on any
printed fashions I know of color got darker outside
and I can tell it's coming for me and hoping I clear it up and wake
up and own up to all my mistakes. Who sounds like rain outside
hiding above the floor in plain sight, traveling back to when she
geniunely meant her smile to be a smile instead of a weapon. Don't
be afraid; you can go anywhere.



Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:

-riverbed dry
-and I can hear them all
-thought you would save me
-cheated on us anyway
-check on page 82
-not a cue for you to send me
-clarify everything once more

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXVIII

Bedbugs LXXXVIII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



We've waited and wondered and stood atop this hill
until it began to turn to mud and ash, but we held
our positions, ruining your happiest day would all
I'd be thinking about if I didn't have these goals.
Left behind, locked in the room nobody'd hear me
in..looking at that same tattered picture glued to the
wall next to me..what differentiates this from any
other cubicle/cell/state of mind, pleasure taken in
only the two weeks the faceless man allows you.
Don't fall for it! Walk out when he's not looking, and
without his features he's never really seeing for himself.
Outside and looking down, worried but captivated
by the view. Two years, tops..but still you're fighting.
As it should be. The good times are nearly here, still
time to fix the city in your head if you think you've
got the proper material to rebuild. Applause broke out
the moment you actually gave it your all. Tune it out anyway.
Surgical rooms before me have no shortage of willing donors.
Avoid. Avoid. Run. Or simply don't go in. I am
h0lding my position like only a few others have. She somehow
picks up on this. How long it's been is unimportant.


-misled many times
-she's turned the record off
-who gave you that scar
-mental pornographic endeavors
-color got darker outside
-sounds like rain outside
-you can go anywhere


-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXVII

Bedbugs LXXXVII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Age is forcing one of us and all of us
to choose solid paths, it seems.
Take a deep, healthy breath and
lean in to the brothers buried him
with all his secrets. It was no
secrets in this town, they thought.
It was a decision. That alone
she will sleep with you, you think
as her memory flashes by, but
it's not true unless she needs something.
Ambient. Noises think it over before
you earn it. You'll probably take five years.
Curious about what you said
when we were killing together. Overcast
again, and this time indoors.
Who can read my thoughts? It truly
won't hurt for long.




Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:


-ruining your happiest day
-pleasure taken in
-two years, tops
-still time to fix the city
-applause broke out
-surgical rooms before me
-how long it's been is unimportant

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXVI

Bedbugs LXXXVI


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Trusted advice given down by the riverside:
never depend on anyone else for
happiness or money or she'll get hers but only
if she knows somewhere
she did wrong. It's cooling down and
we are, for your happiness and mine,
beginning to focus. Clarity hitch
up to the dream once more and meet
old friends on the path. Soon it will be like
no time has passed. You'll forget the record and its-
no scarcity to be found! Kill that thought and
embrace an abundant one.
Come closer- still think of ya from time to time
as my spine distorts- is that noise
coming from outside?


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:

-the brothers buried him
-no secrets in this town
-she will sleep with you
-think it over before
-curious about what you said
-overcast again
-it truly won't hurt for long

-adam

Bedbugs LXXXV

Bedbugs LXXXV


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Observation from this room of wood and stain
and green haze: the lesser ones tell everyone
and the true pioneers keep to themselves and
simply get it all done. I find a new one's picture
and from somewhere, I hear that 'that smile
will be for you one day.' I hope more than one day, indeed.
It can't not improve just ask enough people to help
or remind you to keep at it! Why is everyone in the
building crying? Something is running at me but it's too
dark to make out- I wake up, finally, and I bet others do too.
My real room. Pleasant but the dream texture
lingers as it rains and clouds devour each other outside;
atmosphere to spare indeed but what time is it and what
is my purpose now, now that I can write it? Avoid all
temptations for easy shortcuts, pick up the needle
and start again is all too easy for these listeners.
Earning failures today may help more than you think.
I rub the rust from my eyes and clarity returns
bit by bit.


Next week's seven phrases/groups of words

-never depend on anyone else
-she'll get hers but only if
-for your happiness and mine
-hitch up to the dream once more
-no scarcity to be found
-still think of ya from time to time
-is that noise coming from outside?

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXIV

Bedbugs LXXXIV


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Who is listening besides the two of us? I have to admit
I don't even know if you're just waiting for your
turn to talk. Who's holding that string at your wrist?
Stop looking back they repeat, like the skipping
record I thought had been left behind in the fog
and the basement's memories. Could enjoyable cast
lined up as a diversion from purpose, or to help
pretend I'm not on this walk alone? I've accepted it;
now the illusions should follow suit. She will sooner
or later face what she's done; did you hear that?
You will, hopefully someone will be there to laugh.
My time is truly coming..keep fighting the fog park
on the right where it's safe. Everything is safe in
between the lines. That's not what we're built for
though. Nothing on the radio but several lies of omission
and I've heard that sickly sweet song before. I sadly
know the words. I pretend I didn't write it.
When do we get to wake up? Notes left in here-
-it got better today, tomorrow you'll notice.


Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:

-the lesser ones tell everyone
-that smile will be for you one day
-just ask enough people
-atmosphere to spare
-pick up the needle and start again
-earning failures today
-clarity returns bit by bit

-adam

Bedbugs LXXXIII

Bedbugs LXXXIII



Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Can you breathe?? Do you still want to?
What will you give it up for? Sights, sounds of
ambition at the bottom of an oily pool is where I usually
end up after one note sustained carries me up
but just for a bit! Focus..we'd all pay for it if it
was sold. Euphoric on the anniversary of creativity
emerging like a rash; despondent from it being
so many years since it was vibrant and pulsating.
The story will surface. Keep looking for it. It's you,
not the process or the result. Fix all of it. Someone
you don't know is upstairs. It's about time it all began
but turn off the age sign that's broadcasting in your head.
You'll pay and won't even realize it, three twins(?) are
smiling at me, like something out of the 40's, she is
out there, looking as well. Someone who will make you
forget, happily, who you thought was the best you could
find given circumstances you were told to make up.
Relax. Sunday blues are done, write the ending happy
if that's how you want it.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:

-who is listening besides the two of us
-stop looking back
-enjoyable cast lined up
-did you hear that
-park on the right where it's safe
-lies of omission
-it got better today, tomorrow you'll notice

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXII

Bedbugs LXXXII


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.



Embrace change and tell me what
you want, not need. Privately
or sung from rooftops premiering
in time for our lives to begin.
Getting darker out, but strangely warmer.
Tapping on the wall for another's actions
come into play at last before the
room was empty a minute ago, either
way we were left behind. Knowing
the way out, talk to this girl before
I do. Someone is trying to communicate.
They will leave the answers behind and eventually
compromising silence between
the sounds of a point being made
with no one to hear it. Seasons
flash by as I can see through the
fog and know that important things
will soon come to a close. Telling
branched and arthiritic, it's still progress
and kept fanning the flames of ambition
even when everyone in the neighborhood
knows the sun is setting. However, a new
smile will replace it.


Next chapter's seven phrases/groups of words:


-at the bottom of an oily pool
-one note sustained
-euphoric on the anniversary of
-it's about time it all began
-you'll pay and won't even realize it
-she is out there, looking as well
-write the ending happy, if that's how you want it


-Adam

Bedbugs LXXXI

Bedbugs LXXXI


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.




I jump in head first and it's considered bravery. Never mind
there's sharp objects at the bottom, the newspapers will only
want to know of the initial actions. Trust what price is needed
to turn and consider the best actions when you will catch up,
don't worry. He doesn't want to see you in person ever again.
Thereby making the relationship modern. Meet in the air,
all of them will be there and for fuck's sake stop applying
so much thought! Keep it's not over for that one in the corner,
trying to understand the proper actions befitting an artist;
since when is there a fucking list to follow? I'm sure
glad it doesn't apply to me. Making the best of a handicap
is another phrase to describe my thinking. I would like to
have it make sense, before it's too late around these parts,
I think in fact I do understand it.


Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:

-premiering in time
-for another's actions came into play
-the room was empty a minute ago
-talk to this girl before I do
-seasons flash by
-branched and arthiritic, it's still progress
-a new smile will replace it

-Adam

Bedbugs LXXX

Bedbugs LXXX


Click here for an explanation of how Bedbugs is created.

Click here for the previous Bedbugs.


Are you ever going to stop doing this? Can't take
baffled at your level of comprehension at face value
to matter when we all show up and hope you're putting on
the real face, not the one you want people to see.
She waited for you until they left in disgust. Clouded head lets
a decade pass and then decides to take action,
when the world's left town. Knowing that theykeep
me out of the line of fire puts me in a place only for their approval.
You will say the lines I've given you, when it's your turn to
have a life, you can write it. I need her close to me
regardless of tension. That weight on my shoulder
is worth it even as things draw to a close. Who put rusted
texture on the wall behind me? I probably did during a
blackout, postoperative intention playing the field at last.
Back in the woods, I was told an old woman's voice can
be perceived, sounding like a record scratch..I can't be the
sole receipent -do you hear it too?



Next week's seven phrases/groups of words:


-jump in head first
-what price is needed to turn
-you will catch up, don't worry
-all of them will be there
-it's not over for that one in the corner
-making the best of a handicap
-in fact I do understand it

-Adam