We at The Boutros Boutros Follies are proud to have on board veteran and retired movie critic of The Palm-Aire Gazette of balmy Pompano Beach, Florida - Mr. Frank Palmcoast.
When he's not watching, with beads of sweat, his fellow, legally blind, senior citizens parallel park, Frank is catching seven dollar movies at the local multiplex from sunny Pompano Beach, Florida. He's retired, he's angry with the world, he can't spell to save his life, and he hates Hollywood, but that will not stop our irreverent, dementia fightin', AARP card carrying everyman from giving us a fresh take on everything Hollyweird. Besides, how can he pass up that wonderful senior citizen discount?
Mr Palmcoast offers his typical no holds barred look into the new blockbuster Will Smith flick I Am Legend, and the hot topic of crappy endings.
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For me a much better title for this movie should have been, "I AM STUPID' for paying $7.00 to see it! It's all about the last man on earth. A remake of perhaps the Omega Man or The Castaway. In one Hanks had a volley ball and Smith has a dog and I thought the dog was the best actor. The Ford Motor Company must have payed a lot. The last man on earth picks a Ford Mustang and basically other Ford products--I would have picked Cadillacs, BMW, Rolls Royce's etc. There are these zombies who are not only free from cancer but possess super strengths and continually come thru walls. Come to think about Omega Mans bad guys, they were Albino's and I wonder why Albino's like in the Divinci Code, are always the bad guys! The first half of the movie was kind of interesting but the second half sucked and it had a terrible ending. You know when one actor is the entire movie, it goes from interesting to boring pretty fast. Being the last man on earth and not seeing another human in three years and this young girl shows up and they have bacon and eggs together. Come on, he'd be all over her bones.
Initially I thought this was my biography because where I came from I was the Legend!
I could go on and on but you got your $7.00 revue!
For me a much better title for this movie should have been, "I AM STUPID' for paying $7.00 to see it! It's all about the last man on earth. A remake of perhaps the Omega Man or The Castaway. In one Hanks had a volley ball and Smith has a dog and I thought the dog was the best actor. The Ford Motor Company must have payed a lot. The last man on earth picks a Ford Mustang and basically other Ford products--I would have picked Cadillacs, BMW, Rolls Royce's etc. There are these zombies who are not only free from cancer but possess super strengths and continually come thru walls. Come to think about Omega Mans bad guys, they were Albino's and I wonder why Albino's like in the Divinci Code, are always the bad guys! The first half of the movie was kind of interesting but the second half sucked and it had a terrible ending. You know when one actor is the entire movie, it goes from interesting to boring pretty fast. Being the last man on earth and not seeing another human in three years and this young girl shows up and they have bacon and eggs together. Come on, he'd be all over her bones.
Initially I thought this was my biography because where I came from I was the Legend!
I could go on and on but you got your $7.00 revue!
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Mr. Palmcoast has two more cents to throw in about crappy "Hollysplinter" endings.
Before I'm asked to go on Larry King or perhaps or on the Entertainment Network let me add a Little post script to my "I Am Legend" revue: In my humble opinion Hollysplinter is creating movies for their peers and not their audiences. The endings in No Country For Old Men a great title for old men who hated the ending and Gone Baby Gone absolutely a stupid and an ending that pissed off the entire audience, then there's "Before The Devil Knows Your Dead" another ridiculously stupid ending. The bad guy, the perp, the killer walks--are you shitting me. Another audience puts up with a Hoolwood stupid ending. Now last but certainly not least, the Soprano's. After this audience waited years for them to finally allow the audience to see it's last episodes, the final one, when and where everyone is waiting for the great ending, on perhaps the greatest TV show ever, the screen goes blank and Mr. Chases's brain and the credits begin to roll. I of course would like to see a HAPPY ENDING but I would certainly settle for JUST AN ENDING!
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